Life crises come in all shapes and sizes, and usually when we least expect them.

I am sure that you, like everyone else, will have lived through one or more or many life events such as divorce, breaking up a business partnership, discovering betrayal by an old friend, retirement, bereavement, bankruptcy, and so on. The list goes on and on, and they can leave serious legacies in their wake.

Naturally, we all see the dark side of any life crisis, be it a bereavement, a divorce, losing your job, or whatever. But if you are able to step back a little, look hard at your life, consider your strengths and your weaknesses, you may very well be able to make changes to your life which will result in that elusive state, true happiness and contentment. You may have just lost a well paid job as a finance director, for instance. But you know, deep inside, that you would be much happier doing something else, something quite different - let’s say running a flower nursery. Definitions of tue happiness abound on the internet:

-Happiness comes down to the difference between commitment and attachment -Happiness is social relationships -Happiness is individualistic, varying from one person to another -Happiness is a recipe that includes a number of ingredients -Happiness and unhappiness are two sides of the same coin -Happiness is the highest good -Happiness is about having each tiny wish come true -Happiness is delivered through focussing on the key areas of your life -Happiness is connected with diet and exercise -Happiness is not something that happens to you. It is inside you now -Happiness is the most important and the ultimate objective in life -Happiness is a set of skills you must learn

It is necessary to take stock of oneself, so to speak.

You may have seen the television programmes based on Dr Tal David Ben-Shahar’s book “Happiness 101″, which derived from a course he taught at Harvard of the same name. Dr Ben-Shahar’s central theme is that happiness, not wealth or fame or power is the ultimate currency. Experiences can be pleasureable or meaningful or both, but happiness is to be found at the intersection of the two - in other words, where they overlap. Students should focus on the journey, enjoying each little thing along the way, rather than concentrating on the goal. In other words, stop to smell the roses !

If you think about it, this makes perfect sense. But how many of us actually practice it ? Google Happiness 101 with Tal Ben-Shahar.

There is a new branch of science known as Positive Psychology, which has been developed by Dr Martin Seligman, of the University of Pennsylvania, where he is Director of the Centre of Positive Psychology. Dr Seligman is successfully wooing the study of pyschology away from its traditional narrow minded focus on pathology, victimology, and mental illness to positive emotion, virtue and strength, and positive institutions.

According to Dr Seligman, happiness is not the result of genes or luck. It can be cultivated by identifying and using many of the strengths and traits that we already possess, such as kindness, originality, humour, optimism, and generosity. By knowing and focussing on their “signature strengths”, people can develop natural buffers against misfortune and negative emotion. These “signature strengths” can be grown and developed throughout our lives, yielding positive results in our health, relationships, and careers. This is why a watershed in life is a particularly opportune time for a stringent self examination to identify your “signature strengths”.

Dr Seligman has devised a “Signature Strengths Survey” to assist with this process.

Much more can be learned at his website at Authentic Happiness (http://www.authentichappiness.sas.upenn.edu/Default.aspx).

Finally, if you really want to take your life in hand and achieve real and lasting happiness, try googling these:

BBC News: The Happiness Formula, American Psychological Association (APA), European Network for Positive Psychology, National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH), Positive Organizational Scholarship at the University of Michigan School of Business, Positive Psychology Center: Research Information, Quality of Life Research Center, VIA Institute on Character, Positive Psychology Anthem.

Peter Shaw is a semi retired writer, bookseller and bookbinder living in the Great Karoo, South Africa. He writes articles and eBooks on the central themes of retirement and happiness. Read more on Peter’s website atabcdigitalbooks Click here to get your own unique version of this article with free reprint rights.